This time of year can make us feel lonely and in search of a man (for all the wrong reasons). But why? Why can’t we be our happy single selves all year round? This holiday season, I’ll be single and thriving.
I know its difficult. You go home for the holidays, and everyone wants to know where you’re working, what you’re studying and worst of all… who you’re dating? The holiday season, from thanksgiving to new year’s, is full of cuddly weather and insta-worthy couple photo ops. This year, I won’t be falling into that trap. Desperately looking for a boyfriend and subconsciously lowering my standards (any man with a sweater I can steal?!?!), instead I’ll be happy.
Here are some of my favourite reminders for thriving as a single woman:
1. Girlfriends conquer all
You can’t tell me I’m wrong when I say there is no better cure for sadness than a girl’s night! A whole evening of drinks, food, laughs and gossip is the best cure for any desperate loneliness. Covid has posed some challenges for girls night but there are plenty of ways to connect with your gals (virtual wine night anyone??).
Ensure you continue to respect and foster those positive, female relationships by spending quality time with the friends that lift you up the most.
2. A job, a hobby, a purpose
I’ll say it a million times over: you won’t be happy in a relationship if you aren’t happy on your own. Find something fulfilling, whether it’s your job, a hobby, your social circle, anything! Once you find what drives you, you’re unstoppable!
3. Stop trying to not be single
When I say stop trying, I don’t really mean stop trying. Keep putting yourself out there, meeting new people, and gaining new experiences – but stop chasing. Being alone is much better than being with the wrong person.
I know it’s easier said than done. Something that has worked for me is “fake it ‘till you make it”. I developed a strong relationship with one of my best girlfriends who was so seemingly confident and independent. It turns out she had just as many doubts and weak moments as the rest of us, but she knew how to talk herself out of it. From her, I learned that sometimes, telling yourself you’re confident, independent, and strong, can help in the process. It’s almost like a self-pep-talk. I began by telling myself these small mantras, and slowly, my friends and family noticed me acting upon these thoughts and taking control of my emotions. So, if you’re struggling without a romantic relationship in your life, grab some girlfriends, pursue a passion, forget the boys and keep reminding yourself how great you are on your own!